Post One - Leaving
November 12, 2006
yay! I have a blog! Lets see if I can maintian this one without leaving for months at a time. For my first post I thought I would talk about leaving.
I am a senior in high school about to go to college in the fall, I don't know where yet, all I know is that I'm going. I'm debating on whether or not I should stay close by at the University of Oregon or should I maybe move a little father away. I mean, I consider myself an independant, hardworking person and I think that I have always been this way but I also feel like im not ready to leave home at all.
In my heart I want to move out and become successful and move back to the big city where I love having a fast paced life and there is always so much to do in the city as opposed to where Im living now where there really is not a lot to do and the diversity of people besides your really wealth kids from your hippies is... non-existant. But I also like the familiarity of things but I guess thats just part of life, being afraid of new things. I find myself more often than not wishing that I was two years old again and I didn't have to think of any of this at least for a little while.
I remember when I was like seven or eight and I would always (well not always) but I would think of what I would be like when I'm older and when I thought of a seventeen or eighteen year old it seemed like it would be this mature adult who can drive and is going to college and knows what they want to do. Now being seventeen almost eighteen I feel nothing like I had imagined 10 years ago. I don't feel like an adult what so ever except for the fact that I can drive and have a real job which I'm not complaining about because I love having both.
I wonder if that is how it is with everyone though. Does an healthy 80 year old man really feel 80 besides the physical detriments of life and the occasional forgeting? I hope not... I think I have a theory here... Throughout life you may learn how to do new things, become wiser from your expiriences, ect but the essence of who you are never really changes for all I know I'm still that 10 year old girl wondering what I will be like when Im older.
I am a senior in high school about to go to college in the fall, I don't know where yet, all I know is that I'm going. I'm debating on whether or not I should stay close by at the University of Oregon or should I maybe move a little father away. I mean, I consider myself an independant, hardworking person and I think that I have always been this way but I also feel like im not ready to leave home at all.
In my heart I want to move out and become successful and move back to the big city where I love having a fast paced life and there is always so much to do in the city as opposed to where Im living now where there really is not a lot to do and the diversity of people besides your really wealth kids from your hippies is... non-existant. But I also like the familiarity of things but I guess thats just part of life, being afraid of new things. I find myself more often than not wishing that I was two years old again and I didn't have to think of any of this at least for a little while.
I remember when I was like seven or eight and I would always (well not always) but I would think of what I would be like when I'm older and when I thought of a seventeen or eighteen year old it seemed like it would be this mature adult who can drive and is going to college and knows what they want to do. Now being seventeen almost eighteen I feel nothing like I had imagined 10 years ago. I don't feel like an adult what so ever except for the fact that I can drive and have a real job which I'm not complaining about because I love having both.
I wonder if that is how it is with everyone though. Does an healthy 80 year old man really feel 80 besides the physical detriments of life and the occasional forgeting? I hope not... I think I have a theory here... Throughout life you may learn how to do new things, become wiser from your expiriences, ect but the essence of who you are never really changes for all I know I'm still that 10 year old girl wondering what I will be like when Im older.
Labels: Life
This entry was posted
on November 12, 2006 at 10:36 PM.
You can skip to the end and leave a response.
November 13, 2006 at 12:52:00 AM PST
I'm in the exact same position right now. I'm debating between the Universtiy of Alaska in Juneau, which is very close to home, and the University of South Dakota. I want to try leaving home and being independent, but at the same time I still think I need support from my family. I hope you find your answer.
P.S. I found your blog through vexels.net